1 00:00:02,327 --> 00:00:04,024 ♪ 2 00:00:30,921 --> 00:00:34,881 Ugh, why do we always get cleanup duty 3 00:00:34,925 --> 00:00:36,361 when they've tortured a Reman? 4 00:00:36,405 --> 00:00:38,842 They leave behind the biggest mess. 5 00:00:38,885 --> 00:00:42,019 Sub-Commander Vrek takes pleasure in our misery. 6 00:00:42,063 --> 00:00:44,326 Hopefully, he doesn't get too comfortable, 7 00:00:44,369 --> 00:00:47,024 for soon my plans will come to fruition 8 00:00:47,068 --> 00:00:49,592 and his life will be disrupted. 9 00:00:49,635 --> 00:00:52,812 You are betraying Sub-Commander Vrek? 10 00:00:52,856 --> 00:00:54,336 That is a pity 11 00:00:54,379 --> 00:00:57,426 because I am already betraying him 12 00:00:57,469 --> 00:01:01,125 and my plans will come to fruition first. 13 00:01:01,169 --> 00:01:03,867 [scoffs] Oh, please, don't make me scoff. 14 00:01:03,910 --> 00:01:05,695 Your plans are barely even schemes. 15 00:01:05,738 --> 00:01:08,741 You wouldn't know a scheme from a conspiracy. 16 00:01:08,785 --> 00:01:10,526 -[alert chiming] -Ooh, an alert. 17 00:01:10,569 --> 00:01:12,658 Our sinister plans will have to wait. 18 00:01:12,702 --> 00:01:14,225 [chuckles] 19 00:01:14,269 --> 00:01:17,185 Ugh, Reman juice never comes out. 20 00:01:17,228 --> 00:01:18,316 Status report. 21 00:01:18,360 --> 00:01:20,362 An unknown ship seems to have 22 00:01:20,405 --> 00:01:21,885 intentionally blocked our path. 23 00:01:21,928 --> 00:01:23,452 VREK: How did they detect us? 24 00:01:23,495 --> 00:01:27,411 Assassination plots against me are one thing, but sabotage? 25 00:01:27,456 --> 00:01:29,719 Is this your doing, Malok? 26 00:01:29,762 --> 00:01:31,286 How dare you. 27 00:01:31,329 --> 00:01:34,027 Of course I crave your demise, but not like... 28 00:01:34,071 --> 00:01:36,334 Silence. I've been stabbing commanders in the back 29 00:01:36,378 --> 00:01:39,207 since before your mother killed her first traitor. 30 00:01:39,250 --> 00:01:40,381 Wipe this crumb 31 00:01:40,425 --> 00:01:41,861 from our path so I can focus 32 00:01:41,905 --> 00:01:43,559 on being suspicious. 33 00:01:43,602 --> 00:01:46,431 Commander, our systems-- they're not responding! 34 00:01:46,475 --> 00:01:48,390 That's impossible. Fire disruptors! 35 00:01:48,433 --> 00:01:50,957 No, it's true. Our shields are deactivating. 36 00:01:51,000 --> 00:01:52,176 Go to cloak! [gasps] 37 00:01:56,441 --> 00:01:57,964 [all scream] 38 00:02:06,016 --> 00:02:08,018 ♪ 39 00:02:24,382 --> 00:02:26,384 ♪ 40 00:02:56,458 --> 00:02:58,460 ♪ 41 00:03:17,435 --> 00:03:19,307 [Shaxs screams] 42 00:03:19,350 --> 00:03:21,004 Let me die! 43 00:03:21,047 --> 00:03:24,486 No, no, no. Stay with me, Shaxs. You're gonna get through this. 44 00:03:24,529 --> 00:03:26,183 We're exploring the galactic frontier, 45 00:03:26,227 --> 00:03:27,793 we need to stay flexible. 46 00:03:27,837 --> 00:03:30,318 -[grunts] -Wow, you're really tight today. 47 00:03:30,361 --> 00:03:32,015 What's got you so tense, amigo? 48 00:03:32,058 --> 00:03:34,844 [groans] One minute, T'Ana's all over me, 49 00:03:34,887 --> 00:03:36,802 the next, she says I'm too clingy 50 00:03:36,846 --> 00:03:38,413 and she won't come out from under the bed. 51 00:03:38,456 --> 00:03:40,850 Have you tried scratching your fingers on the covers and going 52 00:03:40,893 --> 00:03:42,330 -"pss-pss-pss-pss"? -Of course I have! 53 00:03:42,373 --> 00:03:45,071 [grunts] How's it going with the new lieutenants? 54 00:03:45,115 --> 00:03:47,204 -[grunts] -Good, except for Mariner. 55 00:03:47,248 --> 00:03:49,337 -Mm-hmm. -I've got her right where I want her. 56 00:03:49,380 --> 00:03:51,295 She thinks she knows the score, but trust me, 57 00:03:51,338 --> 00:03:53,384 she won't be my problem for long. 58 00:03:53,427 --> 00:03:55,473 -[both laugh] -[groans] 59 00:03:55,517 --> 00:03:58,128 -Hot fudge sundaes after this? -Oh, yeah. 60 00:03:58,171 --> 00:04:00,043 [laughs] Cheat day. 61 00:04:02,045 --> 00:04:03,351 [sighs] 62 00:04:03,394 --> 00:04:06,136 We put a lot of light-years on these orange slabs. 63 00:04:06,179 --> 00:04:08,530 [sniffles] I promised myself I wouldn't get emotional. 64 00:04:08,573 --> 00:04:09,966 Aw, how could you not? 65 00:04:10,009 --> 00:04:11,620 We spent so much time hanging out, 66 00:04:11,663 --> 00:04:14,100 staying up late ranking captains by cuteness, 67 00:04:14,144 --> 00:04:16,538 swapping bodies because of those cosmic rays. 68 00:04:16,581 --> 00:04:18,843 [shudders] We learned too much about each other that day. 69 00:04:18,888 --> 00:04:21,151 I'm even gonna miss the dent I made from all the times 70 00:04:21,194 --> 00:04:23,545 I slammed my head on the ceiling during a red alert. 71 00:04:23,588 --> 00:04:25,329 [sniffles] Goodbye, Denty. 72 00:04:25,373 --> 00:04:26,765 You okay, Mariner? Need any help packing? 73 00:04:26,809 --> 00:04:28,550 No thanks. 74 00:04:28,593 --> 00:04:29,986 Ransom's just gonna knock me back down to ensign anyway. 75 00:04:30,029 --> 00:04:31,640 He promoted you last week. 76 00:04:31,683 --> 00:04:33,728 I just heard him bragging to Shaxs that he's messing with me. 77 00:04:33,772 --> 00:04:35,470 -What? Why? -I mean, who knows. His brain 78 00:04:35,513 --> 00:04:37,602 is, like, the only part of his body he doesn't work out. 79 00:04:37,646 --> 00:04:39,909 But didn't he say he was going to support you? 80 00:04:39,952 --> 00:04:42,520 No, they always do, and then the second I speak my mind? Bam. 81 00:04:42,564 --> 00:04:44,130 Right back to being an ensign. 82 00:04:44,174 --> 00:04:46,176 They always think it's, like, a learning experience. 83 00:04:46,219 --> 00:04:47,873 Wait, is he dumb or playing mind games? 84 00:04:47,917 --> 00:04:49,745 Well, who cares. I'm not falling for it. 85 00:04:49,788 --> 00:04:52,574 Ransom's just waiting for me to mess up, huh? Fine. 86 00:04:52,617 --> 00:04:54,576 I'm gonna become an insubordination supernova 87 00:04:54,619 --> 00:04:56,012 and control my own fate. 88 00:04:56,055 --> 00:04:58,579 But you're not actually gonna blow anything up, right? 89 00:04:58,623 --> 00:05:00,756 No. I'm gonna talk back, break the rules, 90 00:05:00,799 --> 00:05:02,845 crack some inappropriate jokes in front of an ambassador. 91 00:05:02,888 --> 00:05:06,544 When I get demoted, it'll be because I earned it. 92 00:05:06,588 --> 00:05:08,024 Well, that should prove to be a disaster. 93 00:05:08,067 --> 00:05:09,112 Should we go check out our rooms? 94 00:05:09,155 --> 00:05:11,375 Yeah, come on Rutherfor... Oh, right. 95 00:05:11,419 --> 00:05:12,594 I'm sorry. 96 00:05:12,637 --> 00:05:15,118 You guys go ahead. I'm still a lowly ensign. 97 00:05:15,161 --> 00:05:17,425 Ugh, I totally forgot you didn't get promoted with us. 98 00:05:17,468 --> 00:05:19,514 You exude lieutenant junior grade energy. 99 00:05:19,557 --> 00:05:21,167 [sighs] I don't know if I'm going to like 100 00:05:21,211 --> 00:05:23,256 not bunking five feet away from you. I mean, how will I sleep 101 00:05:23,300 --> 00:05:25,433 without someone muttering about the warp threshold? 102 00:05:25,476 --> 00:05:26,956 Aw, Tendi, don't worry, 103 00:05:26,999 --> 00:05:28,914 I'll just get a promotion today so I can join you guys. 104 00:05:28,958 --> 00:05:31,569 I... don't know if it's that easy. 105 00:05:31,613 --> 00:05:33,528 I just have to do some amazing engineering. 106 00:05:33,571 --> 00:05:35,094 How hard could it be? 107 00:05:35,138 --> 00:05:37,401 Oof. What I would give for his confidence. 108 00:05:37,445 --> 00:05:39,838 Huh. Maybe you'd have it if you didn't hit your head so much. 109 00:05:39,882 --> 00:05:42,406 [gasps] Don't say stuff like that in front of Denty. 110 00:05:42,450 --> 00:05:43,886 [Tendi laughs] 111 00:05:52,242 --> 00:05:53,983 What up, nerds? 112 00:05:54,026 --> 00:05:54,984 Who's ready to get mission-y? 113 00:05:55,027 --> 00:05:56,812 Almost on time, Mariner. Well done. 114 00:05:56,855 --> 00:05:58,857 This is Ensign Gary's first away mission, 115 00:05:58,901 --> 00:06:01,425 so I'd like you to take him under your wing. You know, 116 00:06:01,469 --> 00:06:03,079 once you change into your uniform. 117 00:06:03,122 --> 00:06:05,473 No, you know, I thought I'd keep it "caszh" today. 118 00:06:05,516 --> 00:06:08,084 Simple mission, simple outfit. This guy gets it. 119 00:06:08,127 --> 00:06:10,956 Okay. Speaking of the mission, 120 00:06:11,000 --> 00:06:13,524 please fill Ensign Gary in on the particulars. 121 00:06:13,568 --> 00:06:15,352 Can do, hoss. Boom. 122 00:06:15,396 --> 00:06:17,659 Today we're dealing with a classic "menage." 123 00:06:17,702 --> 00:06:19,487 -"Menage"? -A menagerie. 124 00:06:19,530 --> 00:06:21,750 Well, it's basically just a big-ass alien zoo 125 00:06:21,793 --> 00:06:23,534 full of aliens run by another alien. 126 00:06:23,578 --> 00:06:25,144 This one scooped up a couple of humans... 127 00:06:25,188 --> 00:06:26,972 [short chuckle] "by accident," so 128 00:06:27,016 --> 00:06:28,365 we got to bust them the [bleep] out. 129 00:06:28,409 --> 00:06:30,585 Oh, I-I didn't know it would be dangerous. 130 00:06:30,628 --> 00:06:34,327 It's not. And this place has a strict no-weapons policy. 131 00:06:34,371 --> 00:06:36,242 Eh, menageries are always capturing humans 132 00:06:36,286 --> 00:06:38,070 then turning them back over to Starfleet. 133 00:06:38,114 --> 00:06:41,073 We'll be in and out, no biggie. Right, Jack? 134 00:06:41,117 --> 00:06:42,684 Let's just get in the shuttle. 135 00:06:42,727 --> 00:06:44,512 Wait, when you're a lieutenant JG 136 00:06:44,555 --> 00:06:46,209 you can call him Jack? 137 00:06:46,252 --> 00:06:47,515 I always call him Jack because, you know, 138 00:06:47,558 --> 00:06:48,951 socially, we're equals. 139 00:06:48,994 --> 00:06:50,387 Right, Jack? 140 00:06:50,430 --> 00:06:51,867 We're leaving now. 141 00:06:51,910 --> 00:06:53,695 -[chuckles] -BOIMLER: Oh, boy, 142 00:06:53,738 --> 00:06:55,697 Mirror Universe Archer, you're gonna love our new room. 143 00:06:55,740 --> 00:06:57,699 Aah... 144 00:06:57,742 --> 00:07:00,397 [groans] 145 00:07:00,441 --> 00:07:02,007 The nacelle is right there? 146 00:07:02,051 --> 00:07:03,705 Okay, 147 00:07:03,748 --> 00:07:05,576 not the best view, 148 00:07:05,620 --> 00:07:07,926 but I'm sure I'll get used to it. 149 00:07:07,970 --> 00:07:10,015 Aah! Lil' Archer! Ah... 150 00:07:13,149 --> 00:07:14,367 Take her in nice and easy. 151 00:07:14,411 --> 00:07:18,023 Aye aye, sir. Nice and easy. 152 00:07:19,634 --> 00:07:21,287 -What are you doing?! -Slow down, slow down, 153 00:07:21,331 --> 00:07:22,158 slow down! 154 00:07:22,201 --> 00:07:23,594 [grunts] 155 00:07:24,769 --> 00:07:25,857 [exclaims] 156 00:07:25,901 --> 00:07:27,380 I don't want to die! 157 00:07:27,424 --> 00:07:29,470 [screams] 158 00:07:31,689 --> 00:07:34,387 -Was that nice and easy enough? -That... 159 00:07:34,430 --> 00:07:37,260 was some great piloting. Let's get to work. 160 00:07:37,303 --> 00:07:41,003 [yelps] I need to replicate some new pants. 161 00:07:42,657 --> 00:07:44,789 Oh-ho, greetings. 162 00:07:44,833 --> 00:07:46,312 Narj is happy to welcome you 163 00:07:46,356 --> 00:07:49,751 to Narj's Miraculous Menagerarium, 164 00:07:49,794 --> 00:07:51,753 recently voted one of the top thousand menageries 165 00:07:51,796 --> 00:07:52,971 in the quadrant. 166 00:07:53,015 --> 00:07:54,973 -[whinnies] -Narj will be sad to lose the humans. 167 00:07:55,017 --> 00:07:56,714 They're incredibly popular. 168 00:07:56,758 --> 00:07:58,542 How did they even get locked up here in the first place? 169 00:07:58,586 --> 00:08:00,718 Accidentally scooped up with a shipment of bipedals. 170 00:08:00,762 --> 00:08:02,024 [laughs] 171 00:08:02,067 --> 00:08:04,809 Narj has to admit that Narj does have a hard time 172 00:08:04,853 --> 00:08:06,376 telling non-botanical creatures apart. 173 00:08:06,419 --> 00:08:07,812 [laughs] Happens all the time. 174 00:08:07,856 --> 00:08:09,901 Humans are always getting stuck in menageries. 175 00:08:09,945 --> 00:08:11,990 But don't worry, I brought my best team with me. 176 00:08:12,034 --> 00:08:14,950 We'll be out of your leaves lickity split. 177 00:08:14,993 --> 00:08:17,256 His best team? What the hell is that supposed to mean? 178 00:08:17,300 --> 00:08:19,084 I guess the commander likes us. 179 00:08:19,128 --> 00:08:21,478 What? No, he doesn't. He's messing with me. 180 00:08:21,522 --> 00:08:22,958 He's setting me up for humiliation 181 00:08:23,001 --> 00:08:24,046 when he comes down on me later. 182 00:08:24,089 --> 00:08:26,701 Are you guys breaking up or something? 183 00:08:26,744 --> 00:08:28,833 Yeah, we are, as coworkers. 184 00:08:28,877 --> 00:08:30,443 And we're gonna force it right now. 185 00:08:30,487 --> 00:08:31,793 I'm having a little trouble 186 00:08:31,836 --> 00:08:32,837 decoding the dynamic here, 187 00:08:32,881 --> 00:08:35,318 but I'd really like to be left out of it. 188 00:08:39,627 --> 00:08:40,844 Hey, Narj. 189 00:08:40,889 --> 00:08:42,630 What got you in the prison business, huh? 190 00:08:42,673 --> 00:08:44,632 Just a cruel weirdo who loves locking people up? 191 00:08:44,675 --> 00:08:47,069 A prison is a place for criminals. 192 00:08:47,112 --> 00:08:50,289 -I've given these sweet creatures a safe home. -What about this little guy? 193 00:08:50,333 --> 00:08:52,596 He doesn't deserve to be in your [bleep]-up hobby. 194 00:08:52,640 --> 00:08:54,642 NARJ: Hobby? The Moopsy is Narj's favorite. 195 00:08:54,685 --> 00:08:56,034 Moopsy. 196 00:08:56,078 --> 00:08:57,470 Do you imprison everything you like? 197 00:08:57,514 --> 00:08:59,734 -Of course. -[laughs] Mariner, 198 00:08:59,777 --> 00:09:01,866 it's not our place to judge the menagerie. 199 00:09:01,910 --> 00:09:03,694 We're just here to collect the humans. 200 00:09:03,738 --> 00:09:05,087 No, you're here to collect humans. 201 00:09:05,130 --> 00:09:07,132 I'm here to behuman, 202 00:09:07,176 --> 00:09:09,047 which means calling bull[bleep] when I see it. 203 00:09:09,091 --> 00:09:10,614 Narj does not understand. 204 00:09:10,658 --> 00:09:12,747 Narj abides by Federation law. 205 00:09:12,790 --> 00:09:15,053 [chuckles] Don't worry about it. She's a firebrand, 206 00:09:15,097 --> 00:09:16,968 but I trust her with my life. 207 00:09:17,012 --> 00:09:18,709 No, you're not getting in my head. 208 00:09:18,753 --> 00:09:20,581 Moopsy. 209 00:09:27,892 --> 00:09:29,677 And I can't wait until we're the same rank again because then 210 00:09:29,720 --> 00:09:31,896 we can get back to praising people behind their backs. 211 00:09:31,940 --> 00:09:34,899 [chuckles] I think Boimler's gonna be a great lieutenant. 212 00:09:34,943 --> 00:09:36,684 I don't want you to pressure yourself to get a promotion 213 00:09:36,727 --> 00:09:39,034 just so we can hang out. It can take years. 214 00:09:39,077 --> 00:09:41,950 Don't worry, I've been working on something pretty impressive. 215 00:09:41,993 --> 00:09:43,429 Billups is gonna love it. 216 00:09:43,473 --> 00:09:45,910 Commander Billups. Can I run something by you, sir? 217 00:09:45,954 --> 00:09:47,782 Of course, Mr. Rutherford. What's up? 218 00:09:47,825 --> 00:09:49,218 For the past year, I've been working 219 00:09:49,261 --> 00:09:50,959 to decrease vibration in the warp manifold 220 00:09:51,002 --> 00:09:53,222 by a factor of .05. 221 00:09:53,265 --> 00:09:55,137 .05? That can't be right. 222 00:09:55,180 --> 00:09:57,661 Well, it wasn't easy, but with a little ingenuity... [chuckles] 223 00:09:57,705 --> 00:09:58,967 BILLUPS: No, I mean it can't be right 224 00:09:59,010 --> 00:10:00,925 because, a few minutes ago, Ensign Livik 225 00:10:00,969 --> 00:10:03,667 decreased the vibration by a factor of .06. 226 00:10:03,711 --> 00:10:05,103 Ensign Livik? Who's that? 227 00:10:05,147 --> 00:10:06,365 -The new guy. -[whooping, cheering] 228 00:10:06,409 --> 00:10:07,932 [chanting]: Livik! Livik! 229 00:10:07,976 --> 00:10:09,542 Livik! Livik! 230 00:10:09,586 --> 00:10:10,718 Livik. 231 00:10:10,761 --> 00:10:12,763 [groaning] 232 00:10:17,246 --> 00:10:19,857 Ha! Stupid bussard light. 233 00:10:19,901 --> 00:10:21,337 You ain't so tough now. 234 00:10:21,380 --> 00:10:22,947 I'll tell you, if Livik keeps this up, 235 00:10:22,991 --> 00:10:24,253 he'll have a promotion in no time. 236 00:10:24,296 --> 00:10:25,558 Let's fire up his protocol right now. 237 00:10:25,602 --> 00:10:27,865 I want to see that .06 in action. 238 00:10:27,909 --> 00:10:30,085 [screaming] 239 00:10:31,347 --> 00:10:32,827 Help. 240 00:10:37,005 --> 00:10:38,136 And right this way. 241 00:10:38,180 --> 00:10:40,051 Hello, humans. 242 00:10:40,095 --> 00:10:42,575 Narj hopes you have enjoyed your stay in the "menage." 243 00:10:42,619 --> 00:10:45,796 Now, it is time for you to return to your natural habitat. 244 00:10:45,840 --> 00:10:47,755 I know you're taking a hit losing these guys. 245 00:10:47,798 --> 00:10:49,147 We appreciate the positive attitude. 246 00:10:49,191 --> 00:10:51,802 Not to worry. My real moneymakers 247 00:10:51,846 --> 00:10:53,935 are the Pyrithian Swamp Gobblers over there. 248 00:10:53,978 --> 00:10:56,067 [roars] 249 00:10:56,111 --> 00:10:57,547 [whines] 250 00:10:57,590 --> 00:10:58,896 Moopsy. 251 00:10:58,940 --> 00:11:00,245 Hm? 252 00:11:00,289 --> 00:11:01,986 Oh, [bleep]! The Moopsy is free! 253 00:11:02,030 --> 00:11:03,988 Oh, no, your cuddliest prisoner is loose. 254 00:11:04,032 --> 00:11:05,381 Whatever shall we do? 255 00:11:05,424 --> 00:11:06,991 NARJ: You don't understand. 256 00:11:07,035 --> 00:11:08,601 Everything here is incredibly dangerous. 257 00:11:08,645 --> 00:11:09,951 MOOPSY: Moopsy. 258 00:11:09,994 --> 00:11:11,561 RANSOM: Can't be worse than the Swamp Gobblers. 259 00:11:11,604 --> 00:11:14,477 Of course it's worse! They only gobble you. 260 00:11:14,520 --> 00:11:16,218 The Moopsy drinks your bones! 261 00:11:16,261 --> 00:11:17,959 How does something drink bones? 262 00:11:19,221 --> 00:11:20,701 [roars] 263 00:11:21,702 --> 00:11:22,920 Holy [bleep]! 264 00:11:22,964 --> 00:11:24,617 NARJ: Run! Run for your lives! 265 00:11:24,661 --> 00:11:27,316 [others screaming] 266 00:11:30,449 --> 00:11:32,451 [fussing] 267 00:11:32,495 --> 00:11:34,323 Moopsy. 268 00:11:34,366 --> 00:11:36,368 RUTHERFORD: Come on, come on, come on, show me that sweet 269 00:11:36,412 --> 00:11:37,935 incremental improvement. 270 00:11:37,979 --> 00:11:39,241 Yes! 271 00:11:39,284 --> 00:11:41,286 Commander Billups? You might want to sit down. 272 00:11:41,330 --> 00:11:43,027 I increased the power output 273 00:11:43,071 --> 00:11:45,682 of the Tucker Tubes by seven pico-cochrans. 274 00:11:45,726 --> 00:11:47,292 That's great, Rutherford. 275 00:11:47,336 --> 00:11:49,294 I just hope those adjustments can apply to the Billups Tubes. 276 00:11:49,338 --> 00:11:50,382 The what now? 277 00:11:50,426 --> 00:11:52,341 Ensign Livik figured out how to add 278 00:11:52,384 --> 00:11:54,996 a third tube without triggering a Heisenberg collapse. 279 00:11:55,039 --> 00:11:56,214 A third tube? 280 00:11:56,258 --> 00:11:59,000 Yeah, and he named it the Billups Tubes. 281 00:11:59,043 --> 00:12:00,566 [laughs] Classic Livik. 282 00:12:00,610 --> 00:12:02,003 -I-I don't even know what we use these for, -[grunts] 283 00:12:02,046 --> 00:12:02,960 but I love them. 284 00:12:03,004 --> 00:12:04,832 -GROUP [chanting]: Livik! Livik! -Livik. 285 00:12:06,137 --> 00:12:09,619 Wow, so close to the holodecks. This is gonna be awesome. 286 00:12:09,662 --> 00:12:12,883 [sighs] That's more like it. 287 00:12:12,927 --> 00:12:14,972 Thanks for helping me get my new quarters, sir. 288 00:12:15,016 --> 00:12:16,626 Happy to help, baby bear. 289 00:12:16,669 --> 00:12:19,150 Well, have fun getting settled in. I've got to run. 290 00:12:19,194 --> 00:12:21,718 Dr. T'Ana and I have a date on the holodeck. 291 00:12:21,762 --> 00:12:23,154 Have fun. 292 00:12:23,198 --> 00:12:25,504 You ready to get disgusting? 293 00:12:25,548 --> 00:12:28,203 Has that ever stopped you before? 294 00:12:31,249 --> 00:12:33,512 T'ANA: Computer, activate T'Ana program 35. 295 00:12:33,556 --> 00:12:36,994 Uh, how thin are these walls? 296 00:12:37,038 --> 00:12:38,213 ROBIN HOOD: With me, my merry men. 297 00:12:38,256 --> 00:12:39,954 We must make haste to the castle 298 00:12:39,997 --> 00:12:41,738 to save the Maid Marion. 299 00:12:41,782 --> 00:12:43,479 Ow! What are you doing? 300 00:12:43,522 --> 00:12:46,090 T'ANA: Shut your [bleep] face. I'm Robin Hood now. 301 00:12:46,134 --> 00:12:48,614 Toodley doo! Shaxs, hold him down. 302 00:12:48,658 --> 00:12:50,399 SHAXS: You've already hurt him pretty bad. 303 00:12:50,442 --> 00:12:52,836 -T'ANA: Kick his head! -ROBIN HOOD: Help! A cat 304 00:12:52,880 --> 00:12:56,274 -has stolen my hat and arrows. -[thumping] 305 00:12:56,318 --> 00:12:58,624 SHAXS: Can't we just do the program as intended for once? 306 00:12:58,668 --> 00:13:00,409 T'ANA: Oh! 307 00:13:00,452 --> 00:13:02,541 -[loud banging] -[sighs, clears throat] -[microphone feedback] 308 00:13:02,585 --> 00:13:05,066 FREEMAN: And now that I am president 309 00:13:05,109 --> 00:13:06,502 -of all Starfleet, -[groans] 310 00:13:06,545 --> 00:13:08,112 allow me to present 311 00:13:08,156 --> 00:13:10,898 my inaugural scatting. [scatting] 312 00:13:10,941 --> 00:13:13,639 Why is there a room between two holodecks? 313 00:13:13,683 --> 00:13:15,250 -T'ANA: Don't make me arrow you! -[scatting continues] 314 00:13:15,293 --> 00:13:16,512 SHAXS: Ow! Stop that. 315 00:13:16,555 --> 00:13:18,253 -T'ANA: Make me! -SHAXS: Ow! 316 00:13:18,296 --> 00:13:20,081 T'ANA: I steal from the [bleep] and give to my [bleep]! 317 00:13:20,124 --> 00:13:22,083 [Narj screaming] 318 00:13:25,129 --> 00:13:26,261 [fussing] 319 00:13:26,304 --> 00:13:27,958 Moopsy. 320 00:13:28,002 --> 00:13:29,481 [all panting] 321 00:13:29,525 --> 00:13:31,005 [screams] 322 00:13:33,007 --> 00:13:34,443 [thud] 323 00:13:34,486 --> 00:13:36,749 [grunts] 324 00:13:36,793 --> 00:13:39,752 So much... [gasps] for these new pants. 325 00:13:39,796 --> 00:13:40,928 MARINER: Uh, no-weapons policy 326 00:13:40,971 --> 00:13:42,973 in a death-trap zoo? [bleep] genius. 327 00:13:43,017 --> 00:13:46,020 -What's your problem? -Do I really have to say it? 328 00:13:46,063 --> 00:13:47,717 Wait, you think I let that thing out? 329 00:13:47,760 --> 00:13:49,414 You've been pulling insubordinate crap all day. 330 00:13:49,458 --> 00:13:50,589 Oh, that is rich. 331 00:13:50,633 --> 00:13:51,634 You're the one who let 332 00:13:51,677 --> 00:13:53,244 a bone-eating monster out of its cage. 333 00:13:53,288 --> 00:13:54,550 Uh, Narj will make sure the Moopsy 334 00:13:54,593 --> 00:13:56,117 is still attacking the door. 335 00:13:56,160 --> 00:13:57,509 Yeah, I've been pushing your buttons, because 336 00:13:57,553 --> 00:13:59,337 I knew you were looking for a reason to demote me, 337 00:13:59,381 --> 00:14:01,078 and of course it's for something I didn't even do. 338 00:14:01,122 --> 00:14:02,601 Wait, why would I want to demote you? 339 00:14:02,645 --> 00:14:05,735 Gee, I don't know, how about our entire working relationship? 340 00:14:05,778 --> 00:14:07,215 What? I'm a good boss. 341 00:14:07,258 --> 00:14:09,086 You stabbed me in the foot with a battle blade, 342 00:14:09,130 --> 00:14:12,307 you-you turned into a giant head and tried to eat me, 343 00:14:12,350 --> 00:14:13,743 you tried to trick me into messing up 344 00:14:13,786 --> 00:14:15,527 -on that space elevator... -That was an orbital lift. 345 00:14:15,571 --> 00:14:17,834 And then, after you promised you would believe in me, 346 00:14:17,878 --> 00:14:19,053 I heard you tell Shaxs in the gym 347 00:14:19,096 --> 00:14:20,924 that I wasn't gonna be your problem anymore. 348 00:14:20,968 --> 00:14:23,057 W-What? The gym? You heard that? 349 00:14:23,100 --> 00:14:24,580 Ha! You admit it. 350 00:14:24,623 --> 00:14:27,148 All I meant is that you're not gonna be my problem 351 00:14:27,191 --> 00:14:29,411 because I'm not gonna take the bait with your insubordination. 352 00:14:29,454 --> 00:14:31,195 Bait? What-what are you talking about? 353 00:14:31,239 --> 00:14:32,240 Ugh, it's all in your file. 354 00:14:32,283 --> 00:14:34,024 You've been promoted a dozen times, 355 00:14:34,068 --> 00:14:36,157 then you always get demoted for acting out. 356 00:14:36,200 --> 00:14:38,072 -Yeah, 'cause I'm a, you know, I'm a free spirt. -No. 357 00:14:38,115 --> 00:14:40,422 Because you're manipulating your commanding officers. 358 00:14:40,465 --> 00:14:42,424 I'm gonna be the first one who doesn't fall for it. 359 00:14:42,467 --> 00:14:43,991 Trust me, it's not easy. 360 00:14:44,034 --> 00:14:46,428 [scoffs] I do not try to get demoted. 361 00:14:46,471 --> 00:14:48,430 What have you been doing all day? 362 00:14:48,473 --> 00:14:50,432 No. I... I was... You... 363 00:14:50,475 --> 00:14:52,390 Uh... Okay, fine, that was just today. 364 00:14:52,434 --> 00:14:54,784 -You always do. -No, I don't. I... 365 00:14:54,827 --> 00:14:57,134 Shut up. [sighs] 366 00:14:57,178 --> 00:14:59,136 -Why would I do that? -I don't know. 367 00:14:59,180 --> 00:15:02,052 But I'm sorry to say you still have my unwavering support, 368 00:15:02,096 --> 00:15:03,619 no matter how hard you make it. 369 00:15:03,662 --> 00:15:05,403 [sighs] 370 00:15:05,447 --> 00:15:06,839 I didn't let the Moopsy out. 371 00:15:06,883 --> 00:15:08,580 I believe you. 372 00:15:08,624 --> 00:15:10,539 Okay. Thank you. 373 00:15:10,582 --> 00:15:12,889 I'm glad you two worked your whole thing out, 374 00:15:12,933 --> 00:15:15,283 but can we maybe focus on the bone-drinking monster 375 00:15:15,326 --> 00:15:17,328 this plant guy probably set loose? 376 00:15:17,372 --> 00:15:19,548 You accuse Narj of Moopsy freeing? 377 00:15:19,591 --> 00:15:21,289 Narj would never do such a thing. 378 00:15:21,332 --> 00:15:24,205 Not even if we got killed and you kept your valuable humans? 379 00:15:24,248 --> 00:15:26,511 Plus, you're a tree-- you probably don't even have bones. 380 00:15:26,555 --> 00:15:28,992 Ridiculous! Narj is ossified. Narj... 381 00:15:29,036 --> 00:15:30,124 -[gasps] -Hm? 382 00:15:30,167 --> 00:15:32,256 Moopsy. 383 00:15:32,300 --> 00:15:33,561 -[growls] -[screaming] 384 00:15:34,432 --> 00:15:37,218 GARY: It's chugging him! 385 00:15:39,960 --> 00:15:41,700 Wait, the door. 386 00:15:43,267 --> 00:15:45,487 -[yawns] -Phew, no ladders. 387 00:15:45,530 --> 00:15:47,141 Now it can't get back through those vents. 388 00:15:47,184 --> 00:15:49,795 Yeah. Now it's trapped in the... 389 00:15:49,839 --> 00:15:52,885 station's main control room. 390 00:15:54,365 --> 00:15:55,976 Moopsy. 391 00:16:09,206 --> 00:16:10,773 Ah, this is perfect. 392 00:16:10,816 --> 00:16:12,862 A nice, dark Jefferies Tube 393 00:16:12,905 --> 00:16:15,691 where we can't hear anyone decapitate Peter Pan. 394 00:16:15,734 --> 00:16:17,910 Ah, this is much better than the bunks. 395 00:16:17,954 --> 00:16:19,260 -Hey, Boimler. -Aah! 396 00:16:19,303 --> 00:16:20,261 What you doing in here? 397 00:16:20,304 --> 00:16:21,566 Hey, Rutherford. 398 00:16:21,610 --> 00:16:25,266 Uh, I live here now. You doing a systems check? 399 00:16:25,309 --> 00:16:26,876 Nah, I'm trying to find a way to diffuse heat conduction 400 00:16:26,919 --> 00:16:28,269 by a few nanojoules. 401 00:16:28,312 --> 00:16:30,401 Oh, some ensign just came through here 402 00:16:30,445 --> 00:16:32,403 doing the exact same thing. 403 00:16:32,447 --> 00:16:34,144 Seemed like a real wunderkind. I was impressed. 404 00:16:34,188 --> 00:16:35,537 [scoffs] Livik. 405 00:16:35,580 --> 00:16:38,453 Leave some minor improvements for the rest of us, guy! 406 00:16:38,496 --> 00:16:40,063 -Dinner later? -Sure. 407 00:16:41,412 --> 00:16:43,719 [Gary screaming] 408 00:16:43,762 --> 00:16:45,286 Hey, calm down. 409 00:16:45,329 --> 00:16:47,897 You calm down! If you two hadn't been bickering, 410 00:16:47,940 --> 00:16:50,334 we wouldn't be falling into a planet! 411 00:16:50,378 --> 00:16:51,944 Nobody's dying today 412 00:16:51,988 --> 00:16:54,295 because I'm gonna crawl through the vents, unlock the door, 413 00:16:54,338 --> 00:16:55,426 and get the Moopsy to chase me out, 414 00:16:55,470 --> 00:16:56,732 so you two can rush in and stabilize 415 00:16:56,775 --> 00:16:58,603 the orbit while it drinks my bones. 416 00:16:58,647 --> 00:17:00,301 -[grunts] -Stand down, Mariner. 417 00:17:00,344 --> 00:17:01,476 Jack, we are plummeting. 418 00:17:01,519 --> 00:17:03,478 Even if this works, we'll only stop re-entry 419 00:17:03,521 --> 00:17:05,219 by the skin of our teeth. 420 00:17:05,262 --> 00:17:07,743 Wait, that's it. Mariner, 421 00:17:07,786 --> 00:17:09,049 punch me in the face. 422 00:17:10,005 --> 00:17:11,398 That's an order, Lieutenant. 423 00:17:11,442 --> 00:17:12,965 Okay. [grunts] 424 00:17:13,009 --> 00:17:15,359 Come on, as hard as you can. [grunts] 425 00:17:15,403 --> 00:17:17,318 [grunts] 426 00:17:17,360 --> 00:17:18,667 -That thing wants bones? -[exclaiming] 427 00:17:18,710 --> 00:17:19,841 We'll give it bones. 428 00:17:19,885 --> 00:17:21,321 MARINER: Oh, you're a genius. 429 00:17:21,365 --> 00:17:23,367 -[grunting] -[both laughing] 430 00:17:24,760 --> 00:17:28,197 I should have been an outpost scientist. 431 00:17:28,242 --> 00:17:30,331 -[panting] -Wait, Rutherford, 432 00:17:30,374 --> 00:17:31,897 you've been working yourself to death all day. 433 00:17:31,941 --> 00:17:33,682 -You don't have to do this. -No. 434 00:17:33,725 --> 00:17:35,336 This time I nailed it. 435 00:17:35,379 --> 00:17:37,164 I sped up the replicators by nine whole femtoseconds. 436 00:17:37,207 --> 00:17:38,904 I'm definitely getting a promotion now. 437 00:17:38,948 --> 00:17:41,472 You and I'll be the same rank and stay friends forever. 438 00:17:41,516 --> 00:17:42,952 Billups. Whew. It took an unbelievable 439 00:17:42,995 --> 00:17:44,823 amount of engineering, but I finally 440 00:17:44,867 --> 00:17:46,738 managed... -I'm sure whatever you did is great, Mr. Rutherford, 441 00:17:46,782 --> 00:17:49,350 -but it'll have to wait until after the pip ceremony. -Huh? 442 00:17:49,393 --> 00:17:50,133 [cheering] 443 00:17:52,179 --> 00:17:53,876 Livik! 444 00:17:56,400 --> 00:17:58,402 I'm sorry, Tendi. 445 00:17:58,446 --> 00:18:00,709 I let you down. 446 00:18:00,752 --> 00:18:03,277 -Mr. Rutherford, stand at attention. -What? 447 00:18:03,320 --> 00:18:05,757 I am your superior, Ensign. Do it. 448 00:18:05,801 --> 00:18:07,672 We'll be friends no matter what our ranks are. 449 00:18:07,716 --> 00:18:09,413 We're going to spend tons of time hanging out 450 00:18:09,457 --> 00:18:11,633 and talking about science and telling jokes and, you know, 451 00:18:11,676 --> 00:18:13,852 do all the things we used to do. And that's an order. 452 00:18:13,896 --> 00:18:16,464 -Yes, ma'am. -[both laugh] 453 00:18:16,507 --> 00:18:18,379 Oh, my gosh, I just gave my first order. 454 00:18:18,422 --> 00:18:20,946 -Oh. -Man, now I wish 455 00:18:20,990 --> 00:18:23,601 I hadn't turned down all those promotions. 456 00:18:23,645 --> 00:18:24,646 Sorry, what? 457 00:18:24,689 --> 00:18:26,082 You know, for saving the Cerritos 458 00:18:26,126 --> 00:18:27,257 from the Pakleds 459 00:18:27,301 --> 00:18:28,911 and the Rubidoux from the space jellyfish, 460 00:18:28,954 --> 00:18:29,955 stuff like that. 461 00:18:29,999 --> 00:18:32,044 Wait, why did you turn them all down? 462 00:18:32,088 --> 00:18:34,656 [sighs] Because I didn't want my own room 463 00:18:34,699 --> 00:18:36,223 where I wouldn't be near you. 464 00:18:36,266 --> 00:18:39,835 Aw, Rutherford, but can't you just go accept one right now? 465 00:18:39,878 --> 00:18:42,272 Nah, they took it really seriously in engineering. 466 00:18:42,316 --> 00:18:44,405 -You have to earn it with a scientific... -Hey, Billups! 467 00:18:44,448 --> 00:18:45,449 Can Rutherford have his promotion 468 00:18:45,493 --> 00:18:47,277 for that time he removed the hull? 469 00:18:47,321 --> 00:18:50,715 Oh, sure. Ah, sorry, Livik, maybe next time. 470 00:18:52,761 --> 00:18:55,459 Wait, I can just ask for stuff I deserve? 471 00:18:55,503 --> 00:18:58,680 -I guess. -[chanting]: Rutherford! Rutherford! 472 00:18:58,723 --> 00:19:01,857 Hooray! [laughs, whoops] Thanks, everyone. 473 00:19:02,988 --> 00:19:04,468 Rutherford. 474 00:19:04,512 --> 00:19:06,427 And also Tendi. 475 00:19:06,470 --> 00:19:08,168 [alarm blaring] 476 00:19:11,954 --> 00:19:13,434 Moopsy. 477 00:19:17,046 --> 00:19:18,526 [grunting] 478 00:19:23,139 --> 00:19:24,532 Moopsy. 479 00:19:24,575 --> 00:19:27,622 [grunts] Got you, you cuddly little murderer. 480 00:19:27,665 --> 00:19:30,842 [laughs] We say-bih-eye da say-sa orbih! 481 00:19:30,886 --> 00:19:32,496 [snorts] What's that, Gummy? 482 00:19:32,540 --> 00:19:34,281 We stabilized the station's orbit. 483 00:19:34,324 --> 00:19:37,588 Oh, man, victory really is that much sweeter 484 00:19:37,632 --> 00:19:39,286 when you almost got killed. 485 00:19:39,329 --> 00:19:40,635 I just wish we could have figured out 486 00:19:40,678 --> 00:19:42,724 how this little guy got out in the first place. 487 00:19:42,767 --> 00:19:44,987 I mean, it clearly wasn't Narj, dude was brimming with bones. 488 00:19:45,030 --> 00:19:46,423 [lisping]: Let's get these humans 489 00:19:46,467 --> 00:19:48,556 out of here. Starfleet security can figure it out. 490 00:19:48,599 --> 00:19:50,819 Well, at least it wasn't our fault. 491 00:19:50,862 --> 00:19:52,647 You know, humans are always being blamed 492 00:19:52,690 --> 00:19:55,737 for being dangerous, but we don't have claws or fangs 493 00:19:55,780 --> 00:19:57,042 -or... -Hey, that umbrella 494 00:19:57,086 --> 00:19:58,653 is upside down, yeah? 495 00:20:03,875 --> 00:20:06,095 Did you [bleep] rewire the Moopsy door? 496 00:20:06,138 --> 00:20:08,184 -You could've got us all killed. -RANSOM: Wow. 497 00:20:08,228 --> 00:20:11,361 I guess humans really are the most dangerous game. 498 00:20:11,405 --> 00:20:13,320 Damn it. 499 00:20:15,191 --> 00:20:17,149 MARINER: Lieutenant junior grade's log.. 500 00:20:17,193 --> 00:20:20,022 Nope, no, too weird. Uh, let's go with 501 00:20:20,065 --> 00:20:22,938 Mariner's log. So, yeah, of course 502 00:20:22,981 --> 00:20:24,331 it was the humans in the menagerie 503 00:20:24,374 --> 00:20:25,984 that set the Moopsy free. 504 00:20:26,028 --> 00:20:28,073 They'd seen how profitable they were as an attraction, 505 00:20:28,117 --> 00:20:31,207 so they wanted to kill Narj and keep the station for themselve. 506 00:20:31,251 --> 00:20:33,514 Humans-- we really are the worst. 507 00:20:33,557 --> 00:20:34,906 -[laughs] -MARINER: So, anyway, 508 00:20:34,950 --> 00:20:37,387 instead of bringing them to theCerritos, we left them 509 00:20:37,431 --> 00:20:39,955 in the menagerie until somebody else has time to pick them up. 510 00:20:39,998 --> 00:20:41,348 Could take a while. 511 00:20:41,391 --> 00:20:43,524 As for Ransom, it took some doing, 512 00:20:43,567 --> 00:20:45,526 but Dr. T'Ana was able to fix him up 513 00:20:45,569 --> 00:20:46,918 with a new set of chompers. 514 00:20:46,962 --> 00:20:48,616 Just don't eat any hard stuff for a few days 515 00:20:48,659 --> 00:20:51,140 while the veneers set. Now, if you'll excuse me, 516 00:20:51,183 --> 00:20:53,055 I have to go kill the sheriff of Nottingham 517 00:20:53,098 --> 00:20:54,448 for being a little [bleep] face. 518 00:20:54,491 --> 00:20:55,710 [laughs] 519 00:20:55,753 --> 00:20:58,016 So, uh, sorry I knocked all your teeth out. 520 00:20:58,060 --> 00:20:59,757 I ended up only needing, like, ten of them. 521 00:20:59,801 --> 00:21:02,151 I was just happy you were following my orders. 522 00:21:02,194 --> 00:21:04,196 I'm sorry I doubted you, sir. 523 00:21:04,240 --> 00:21:06,329 I haven't always been the most supportive over the years, 524 00:21:06,373 --> 00:21:08,375 but at least now you know I'm definitely not gonna let you 525 00:21:08,418 --> 00:21:09,941 self-sabotage anymore. 526 00:21:09,985 --> 00:21:12,379 So, maybe we can cool it on the reign of terror. 527 00:21:12,422 --> 00:21:15,077 Yeah. Yeah. That'll be, uh, interesting. 528 00:21:15,120 --> 00:21:16,165 Trust me, Mariner, 529 00:21:16,208 --> 00:21:18,167 you're gonna be a great officer. 530 00:21:18,210 --> 00:21:19,908 Just like me. 531 00:21:22,650 --> 00:21:24,216 -Congrats on the promotion, man. -Thanks. 532 00:21:24,260 --> 00:21:25,827 And great call on us being roommates. 533 00:21:25,870 --> 00:21:28,003 We're gonna get even better quarters than if we were alone. 534 00:21:28,046 --> 00:21:30,571 Oh, really? No way. 535 00:21:30,614 --> 00:21:31,789 [chuckles] Aah! 536 00:21:31,833 --> 00:21:34,226 No! Oh, no, no, no, no, no, this can't be happening. 537 00:21:34,270 --> 00:21:35,489 Whoa! That's bright. 538 00:21:35,532 --> 00:21:38,230 Just got to dim the view ports, 539 00:21:38,274 --> 00:21:40,189 and we're all set. 540 00:21:40,232 --> 00:21:41,843 [whimpers] 541 00:21:41,886 --> 00:21:44,236 Hope you don't mind me tinkering on projects all night. Ow! 542 00:21:44,280 --> 00:21:47,152 [chuckles] If you see any sparks, just stamp them out. 543 00:21:47,196 --> 00:21:48,371 [sighs] 544 00:21:48,415 --> 00:21:50,155 Ooh! Ah... 545 00:21:52,593 --> 00:21:53,942 Huh. 546 00:21:53,985 --> 00:21:55,291 You know what? 547 00:21:55,335 --> 00:21:57,946 This is already starting to feel like home. 548 00:22:00,688 --> 00:22:03,386 Captioned by Media Access Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org 549 00:22:58,833 --> 00:23:00,312 [man imitates weapons firing] 550 00:23:02,402 --> 00:23:04,273 Chirp.