1 00:00:02,089 --> 00:00:03,786 ♪ ♪ 2 00:00:27,201 --> 00:00:29,507 T'LYN: Hmm. Will someone please explain 3 00:00:29,638 --> 00:00:31,683 why we are mutilating gourds? 4 00:00:31,814 --> 00:00:34,208 It's an ancient Earth tradition for a holiday called Halloween. 5 00:00:34,338 --> 00:00:35,731 Jack-o'-lanterns were supposed to keep demons 6 00:00:35,818 --> 00:00:37,124 from entering your home. 7 00:00:37,211 --> 00:00:38,821 Huh. I thought they were just spooky and fun. 8 00:00:38,995 --> 00:00:41,345 Is it sad that Tendi knows more of our history than we do? 9 00:00:41,476 --> 00:00:42,955 Oh, yeah. 10 00:00:43,130 --> 00:00:45,654 - Check it out. - BOIMLER: Oh, look at 11 00:00:45,828 --> 00:00:47,395 - the little Cerritos. - Aw, that's so cute. - Commendable accuracy. 12 00:00:47,482 --> 00:00:50,006 Hey, guys. Oh, nice, I didn't miss the pumpkin party. 13 00:00:50,180 --> 00:00:52,052 - Whoa, what's with all the paint? - Away mission. 14 00:00:52,226 --> 00:00:54,619 We were supposed to study a calcified forest on Malman 5, 15 00:00:54,750 --> 00:00:57,405 - but then we got trapped in a painting. - What? No way. 16 00:00:57,579 --> 00:00:59,798 Yeah, some local was using hologram tech to take pictures 17 00:00:59,929 --> 00:01:01,713 of the landscape and accidentally sucked us in. 18 00:01:01,844 --> 00:01:03,411 It turned into a whole, big epic escape. 19 00:01:03,541 --> 00:01:05,152 I got to ride a rainbow. 20 00:01:05,239 --> 00:01:07,719 Oh, man, I've always wanted to get stuck in a painting. 21 00:01:07,806 --> 00:01:08,851 Anything happen while I was gone? 22 00:01:08,938 --> 00:01:10,896 Nope. Same old, same old. 23 00:01:11,027 --> 00:01:12,246 [short chuckle] Classic Cerritos. 24 00:01:12,376 --> 00:01:14,161 You know, on other ships, it's the command crew 25 00:01:14,248 --> 00:01:16,598 that gets into trouble, not, like, random lower deckers. 26 00:01:16,728 --> 00:01:18,556 That's okay. I like our commanders. 27 00:01:18,643 --> 00:01:20,384 I mean, so do I, but they're no Janeway, 28 00:01:20,515 --> 00:01:22,299 Kirk or Sisko, you know? 29 00:01:22,430 --> 00:01:24,171 Yeah, our guys mostly spend their time doing paperwork 30 00:01:24,301 --> 00:01:26,347 instead of carving V'ger. 31 00:01:26,477 --> 00:01:27,826 - TENDI: Oh. - BOIMLER: Whoa. 32 00:01:27,957 --> 00:01:29,437 "The Creator must join with V'ger." 33 00:01:29,567 --> 00:01:32,396 Boimler, let's, uh, let's go replicate some more snacks. 34 00:01:32,483 --> 00:01:34,833 All right, remember to stay out of sight 35 00:01:34,964 --> 00:01:36,661 or you're gonna get pulled into some boring bridge crew meeting. 36 00:01:36,835 --> 00:01:38,185 We deserve a day off. 37 00:01:38,315 --> 00:01:39,708 You know, it's kind of funny, 38 00:01:39,838 --> 00:01:41,623 we're sort of the stars of the show around here. 39 00:01:41,753 --> 00:01:43,668 The commanders seem to just fade into the background. 40 00:01:43,842 --> 00:01:47,455 Yep, without us lower deckers, there'd be nothing to see. 41 00:01:47,542 --> 00:01:49,413 - Oh, crap! - STEVENS: [chuckles] We've got another 42 00:01:49,500 --> 00:01:52,024 full schedule on the old to-do list, Captain. 43 00:01:52,112 --> 00:01:54,984 - I never get a day off, do I? - Not with me around. 44 00:01:55,115 --> 00:01:58,422 Now, remember, I need a couple of hours for myself tonight. 45 00:01:58,509 --> 00:02:00,424 Well, we better hurry, then. Your schedule's pretty full. 46 00:02:00,598 --> 00:02:03,079 Never a dull moment when you're in command. 47 00:02:03,210 --> 00:02:05,951 Nothing would ever happen around here 48 00:02:06,082 --> 00:02:08,650 without the bridge crew. 49 00:02:12,958 --> 00:02:15,047 ♪ ♪ 50 00:02:31,455 --> 00:02:33,414 ♪ ♪ 51 00:03:07,535 --> 00:03:09,754 ♪ ♪ 52 00:03:24,204 --> 00:03:26,380 ♪ ♪ 53 00:03:28,338 --> 00:03:30,427 The Zerta pathogen has been contained to Deck Four. 54 00:03:30,514 --> 00:03:31,820 Officer Barnes has almost recovered 55 00:03:31,950 --> 00:03:33,604 from her transformation. 56 00:03:33,735 --> 00:03:36,825 Oh, yes, the virus that caused her DNA to... what was it? 57 00:03:36,955 --> 00:03:39,001 Evolve? Devolve? 58 00:03:39,131 --> 00:03:41,046 Both. She was a futuristic cavewoman 59 00:03:41,177 --> 00:03:43,962 who could read minds but was also afraid of open flame. 60 00:03:44,093 --> 00:03:45,964 How did you get her to stop attacking people? 61 00:03:46,095 --> 00:03:47,749 Eh, thought about a candle. 62 00:03:47,879 --> 00:03:50,317 That reminds me, Dr. T'Ana, we've had some complaints 63 00:03:50,447 --> 00:03:52,536 - about your pain management. - Who squealed? 64 00:03:52,710 --> 00:03:55,583 Just, please, brush up on your anesthetics. 65 00:03:55,713 --> 00:03:56,801 Security. 66 00:03:56,932 --> 00:03:58,455 Mosaro, when the lake was smooth. 67 00:03:58,586 --> 00:04:00,457 Starfleet Command reports increased chatter 68 00:04:00,544 --> 00:04:01,676 from the Clickets. 69 00:04:01,763 --> 00:04:03,243 Nothing that should affect us. 70 00:04:03,373 --> 00:04:05,288 - The who? - They're the insectoid species 71 00:04:05,419 --> 00:04:06,768 that hate being complimented. 72 00:04:06,942 --> 00:04:08,422 Wonder what they're mad about now. 73 00:04:08,596 --> 00:04:10,250 Maybe someone gave them a birthday present. 74 00:04:10,337 --> 00:04:12,687 [laughing] 75 00:04:12,774 --> 00:04:15,994 Just keep me updated. Mr. Shaxs? 76 00:04:16,125 --> 00:04:18,083 [muffled]: Are you feeling okay? 77 00:04:18,214 --> 00:04:20,477 - Mr. Shaxs, what-what is going on over there? - Uh... 78 00:04:20,608 --> 00:04:22,044 [hissing] 79 00:04:22,174 --> 00:04:23,393 - [gasps] - FREEMAN [clear]: Mr. Shaxs, 80 00:04:23,567 --> 00:04:25,177 you're looking a little out of sorts. 81 00:04:25,265 --> 00:04:27,136 Requesting a day off, uh, effective immediately. 82 00:04:27,310 --> 00:04:29,834 - Okay. Granted. - [groans] 83 00:04:29,921 --> 00:04:32,141 [panting] 84 00:04:32,272 --> 00:04:33,969 We still can't figure out 85 00:04:34,099 --> 00:04:36,537 what's got these buhgoon creatures all riled up. 86 00:04:36,667 --> 00:04:39,235 Hopefully the Starfleet ecologist can sort it out. 87 00:04:39,366 --> 00:04:40,715 Make sure he gets whatever he needs. 88 00:04:40,802 --> 00:04:42,978 I don't want those things defecating all over the hull. 89 00:04:43,152 --> 00:04:44,284 Engineering? 90 00:04:44,371 --> 00:04:45,720 My team refreshed all the Cordry rocks 91 00:04:45,807 --> 00:04:47,461 in the ceiling panels on the bridge. 92 00:04:47,591 --> 00:04:48,810 Ugh, hate those things. They always fall out 93 00:04:48,940 --> 00:04:50,855 and hit me on the head when we take damage. 94 00:04:50,942 --> 00:04:53,989 Well, their non-centrosymmetry disrupts the charge leptons 95 00:04:54,119 --> 00:04:56,034 in the isolinear pathways of the main deflector, 96 00:04:56,165 --> 00:04:59,037 - which then causes... - I trust you have it in hand. 97 00:04:59,168 --> 00:05:00,778 If there's nothing else... 98 00:05:00,909 --> 00:05:02,084 Bring it in, everyone. 99 00:05:02,214 --> 00:05:03,738 ALL: Strong and brave, wise and true, 100 00:05:03,868 --> 00:05:06,697 - that's what makes us Cerritos crew! - Yeah. 101 00:05:06,828 --> 00:05:08,264 What's up next? 102 00:05:08,438 --> 00:05:10,266 Ensign Barnes' sousaphone recital. 103 00:05:10,440 --> 00:05:13,661 She hasn't mastered the basics, but she's gotten very loud. 104 00:05:13,791 --> 00:05:16,272 Didn't Barnes just evolve/devolve into a cavewoman? 105 00:05:16,403 --> 00:05:18,622 Apparently, it didn't affect her sousaphone blowing. 106 00:05:18,753 --> 00:05:20,624 Great. 107 00:05:22,191 --> 00:05:23,540 RANSOM: First officer's log. 108 00:05:23,627 --> 00:05:25,673 When a specialist visits the ship, 109 00:05:25,760 --> 00:05:29,503 I like to make sure they feel like they have our full support. 110 00:05:29,633 --> 00:05:31,026 Right this way, Professor. 111 00:05:31,113 --> 00:05:32,332 My team's working on getting a space cow 112 00:05:32,462 --> 00:05:33,898 for you to check out. 113 00:05:34,029 --> 00:05:36,118 The buhgoon are a rare, endangered extremophile, 114 00:05:36,205 --> 00:05:37,772 not cows. 115 00:05:37,902 --> 00:05:39,774 I've never been able to study one up close before. 116 00:05:39,861 --> 00:05:42,080 Well, they look like cows to me. 117 00:05:42,211 --> 00:05:43,604 - MOXY: What's taking you guys so long? - [overlapping chatter] 118 00:05:43,734 --> 00:05:46,084 - Come on. - Get in here, you friggin' thing. 119 00:05:46,215 --> 00:05:48,086 It can't hear you, it's in space. 120 00:05:48,260 --> 00:05:50,219 - [groans] - KARAVITUS: Okay, genius, you tell me how to get it in there. 121 00:05:50,350 --> 00:05:52,743 What do you think I'm doing over here with the tractor beam? 122 00:05:52,874 --> 00:05:54,745 RANSOM: While scientists can be high-maintenance, 123 00:05:54,876 --> 00:05:57,052 it's usually getting our lower decks to work with each other 124 00:05:57,182 --> 00:05:57,922 that can be the tricky part. 125 00:05:58,053 --> 00:05:59,141 Lock it down, ensigns. 126 00:05:59,228 --> 00:06:00,664 Maybe a little less arguing 127 00:06:00,795 --> 00:06:02,623 and you'd have one of those buhgoon in here. 128 00:06:02,710 --> 00:06:04,581 We're trying to get one, but Ensign Friendly 129 00:06:04,668 --> 00:06:06,061 doesn't want to hurt their feelings. 130 00:06:06,191 --> 00:06:07,845 Hey, you take that back! I'm not friendly! 131 00:06:07,976 --> 00:06:09,499 - Do you hear yourself? - MOXY: Uh-oh, it worked too well. 132 00:06:09,630 --> 00:06:11,458 We got an asteroid incoming. Look out! 133 00:06:11,588 --> 00:06:13,198 Aah! [Grunts] 134 00:06:13,329 --> 00:06:15,375 [low growl] 135 00:06:15,505 --> 00:06:18,595 Ha. Us Delta Shifters know how to take care of a problem. 136 00:06:18,682 --> 00:06:20,423 Hey, you almost killed me. 137 00:06:20,554 --> 00:06:22,599 Then why don't you almost complain about it? 138 00:06:22,686 --> 00:06:23,948 [wails] 139 00:06:24,035 --> 00:06:25,472 Ugh, what the heck? 140 00:06:25,602 --> 00:06:26,821 A natural cloaking ability. 141 00:06:26,908 --> 00:06:28,562 Ha, they use their hide to hide. 142 00:06:28,692 --> 00:06:30,564 - [shouts] - Look out! - Somebody grab it. 143 00:06:30,694 --> 00:06:32,130 What do you mean, grab it? It's the size of a shuttle. 144 00:06:32,261 --> 00:06:34,045 - Don't you talk to me like that. - I never want to work 145 00:06:34,132 --> 00:06:36,221 - with you again. - Aah! It rolled on my foot. 146 00:06:36,352 --> 00:06:38,049 - CASTRO: What's wrong with you? - [whistles] 147 00:06:38,136 --> 00:06:41,139 This reminds me of a story. 148 00:06:41,313 --> 00:06:42,663 Back a few hundred stardates ago, 149 00:06:42,750 --> 00:06:45,927 there was another commander who could bench 305. 150 00:06:46,057 --> 00:06:48,799 Okay? Which meant I had to do something to impress her... 151 00:06:48,930 --> 00:06:50,932 Kimolu and Matt said I couldn't beat Big Wave Tommy 152 00:06:51,106 --> 00:06:52,499 because he was king of the beach. 153 00:06:52,673 --> 00:06:54,501 - [groans] - It took a lot of gnar shredding, 154 00:06:54,631 --> 00:06:57,112 but once you get your water feet, you are locked in. 155 00:06:57,199 --> 00:06:58,809 So, a week before the competition, 156 00:06:58,940 --> 00:07:00,681 - I started eating a lot of junga fruit. - [groans] 157 00:07:00,811 --> 00:07:03,205 SHAXS: Chief security officer, personal log. 158 00:07:03,292 --> 00:07:06,643 The visions are happening again, more potent than ever before. 159 00:07:06,774 --> 00:07:08,776 Aah! 160 00:07:10,081 --> 00:07:11,300 I don't care how many times 161 00:07:11,431 --> 00:07:12,954 you come back to haunt me. 162 00:07:13,084 --> 00:07:14,912 I'll never let you win. 163 00:07:15,043 --> 00:07:18,220 [laughs] You can't fight me, 164 00:07:18,350 --> 00:07:21,571 because I am you, Papa Bear. 165 00:07:21,658 --> 00:07:25,619 No. You're a freaky little monster that lives in my brain. 166 00:07:25,749 --> 00:07:28,448 Oh, am I? 167 00:07:31,146 --> 00:07:32,582 [gasps, shouts] 168 00:07:34,105 --> 00:07:37,195 The Battle of Tempasa? 169 00:07:37,326 --> 00:07:38,675 - [gasps] - [device beeping] 170 00:07:38,806 --> 00:07:40,851 The Cardassians put a bomb in the artifact. 171 00:07:40,982 --> 00:07:43,985 Everyone, get down! Aah! 172 00:07:44,115 --> 00:07:46,204 [shouts, pants] 173 00:07:46,335 --> 00:07:49,207 As time passes, I grow stronger, 174 00:07:49,381 --> 00:07:52,602 while you get older and fade away. 175 00:07:52,776 --> 00:07:54,430 I'll kill you! I'll... 176 00:07:54,561 --> 00:07:56,040 [shouts] 177 00:07:56,214 --> 00:08:00,305 To control you, I have to control myself. 178 00:08:00,392 --> 00:08:02,656 That's stupid. Hit me! 179 00:08:02,786 --> 00:08:04,048 [inhales] 180 00:08:04,179 --> 00:08:05,354 [meditative humming] 181 00:08:06,442 --> 00:08:09,140 Pathetic. Humming won't hurt me. 182 00:08:09,271 --> 00:08:10,751 But I will! 183 00:08:12,056 --> 00:08:13,971 BILLUPS: Chief engineer's log. 184 00:08:14,102 --> 00:08:15,407 I had a bagel for breakfast, 185 00:08:15,538 --> 00:08:16,583 and it gave me a tummy ache, 186 00:08:16,713 --> 00:08:18,367 but I'm feeling better. 187 00:08:18,454 --> 00:08:19,977 Anyway, uh, nothing engineering-wise to report. 188 00:08:20,064 --> 00:08:21,196 Okay, bye. 189 00:08:21,283 --> 00:08:23,067 Commander, are you busy? 190 00:08:23,241 --> 00:08:24,939 Just monitoring plasma flow. What's up, Ensign? 191 00:08:25,069 --> 00:08:26,723 I've got a nonfunctional indicator light 192 00:08:26,810 --> 00:08:28,246 behind panel 785. 193 00:08:28,377 --> 00:08:29,465 You mind if I go ahead and make the repair? 194 00:08:29,596 --> 00:08:30,727 Well, sounds simple enough. 195 00:08:33,904 --> 00:08:35,471 Uh, sir? 196 00:08:35,602 --> 00:08:36,516 [gasps] 197 00:08:37,604 --> 00:08:38,387 Oh, no. 198 00:08:38,518 --> 00:08:40,824 Everyone, out of here now! 199 00:08:40,955 --> 00:08:42,260 What is it? 200 00:08:42,391 --> 00:08:43,610 Retrofitted plasma canisters. 201 00:08:43,740 --> 00:08:44,872 Help me pull off the panels. 202 00:08:45,046 --> 00:08:46,264 Careful, they're gonna be hot. 203 00:08:47,309 --> 00:08:48,440 MEREDITH: Retrofitted? 204 00:08:48,528 --> 00:08:49,311 BILLUPS: Sometimes I have to get 205 00:08:49,441 --> 00:08:50,747 a little creative with repairs. 206 00:08:50,878 --> 00:08:52,183 I guess I never bothered to replace 'em. 207 00:08:52,314 --> 00:08:53,576 Are they dangerous? 208 00:08:53,663 --> 00:08:55,099 They're chock-full of energized plasma. 209 00:08:55,230 --> 00:08:57,058 We have to disable their power source 210 00:08:57,145 --> 00:08:59,626 or an overload could cascade back to the warp core. Whoo! 211 00:08:59,713 --> 00:09:01,715 - [laughs] - Are you sure you can't do this on your own? 212 00:09:01,845 --> 00:09:03,325 You're the one who spotted the bulb. 213 00:09:03,412 --> 00:09:04,848 It's a good learning experience. 214 00:09:05,022 --> 00:09:08,199 [whimpers] Even if I die? 215 00:09:08,330 --> 00:09:10,201 Everybody dies, but it's the engineers 216 00:09:10,332 --> 00:09:12,160 who really get to live. 217 00:09:13,944 --> 00:09:16,294 T'ANA: Chief medical officer's [bleep] log. 218 00:09:16,425 --> 00:09:18,253 I should be focusing on my work, 219 00:09:18,340 --> 00:09:20,472 but I got some constructive criticism in the staff briefing 220 00:09:20,603 --> 00:09:22,300 that's got me in a [bleep] mood. 221 00:09:22,474 --> 00:09:23,954 I refilled the hyposprays. 222 00:09:24,085 --> 00:09:25,869 We're good to go next time some virus 223 00:09:26,000 --> 00:09:28,176 makes everyone sing or whatever. 224 00:09:28,306 --> 00:09:29,873 Shut up and leave me alone! 225 00:09:29,960 --> 00:09:33,181 Ho-ho, someone woke up on the nasty side of the bed today. 226 00:09:33,311 --> 00:09:34,704 Spare me your [bleep], Westlake. 227 00:09:34,835 --> 00:09:37,141 Nobody else is going to put up with you, honey. 228 00:09:37,272 --> 00:09:40,014 Apparently some of the crew don't like my pain management. 229 00:09:40,144 --> 00:09:41,058 Uh, because you don't? 230 00:09:41,189 --> 00:09:42,886 Manage pain, I mean. 231 00:09:43,017 --> 00:09:45,062 Sick people come in, healthy people go out. 232 00:09:45,236 --> 00:09:46,324 That should be enough. 233 00:09:46,455 --> 00:09:48,631 You swore an oath to do no harm. 234 00:09:48,762 --> 00:09:49,893 Someone's not happy, 235 00:09:50,024 --> 00:09:51,591 they can point to the pain chart. 236 00:09:51,721 --> 00:09:53,593 Just because you have a high pain tolerance 237 00:09:53,680 --> 00:09:55,507 doesn't mean anyone else does. 238 00:09:55,682 --> 00:09:57,553 Okay, yeah. I see what you're saying. 239 00:09:57,684 --> 00:09:59,120 Good. I'll restock the anesth... 240 00:09:59,250 --> 00:10:00,600 We have to update the pain chart. 241 00:10:01,426 --> 00:10:04,081 [meows] 242 00:10:04,212 --> 00:10:05,256 What are you doing? 243 00:10:05,430 --> 00:10:06,431 You're gonna [bleep] me up 244 00:10:06,518 --> 00:10:07,824 so I can feel some pain. 245 00:10:07,911 --> 00:10:09,043 No, this is stupid. 246 00:10:09,173 --> 00:10:10,566 It was your idea. 247 00:10:10,740 --> 00:10:11,828 Now shut up and rearrange my guts. 248 00:10:12,002 --> 00:10:13,395 [sighs] 249 00:10:14,352 --> 00:10:16,485 Come on! Turn up the [bleep] [bleep]! 250 00:10:16,659 --> 00:10:19,227 Oh, [bleep] yes! 251 00:10:19,357 --> 00:10:21,316 [sousaphone playing] 252 00:10:25,842 --> 00:10:28,149 [humming along with music] 253 00:10:30,281 --> 00:10:32,066 Oh, just beautiful. 254 00:10:32,196 --> 00:10:34,895 Hardly affected by your protruding brow. 255 00:10:37,375 --> 00:10:39,900 [grunting] 256 00:10:42,032 --> 00:10:43,860 ENSIGN: When my reproductive jelly started emulsifying, 257 00:10:43,991 --> 00:10:45,514 my first thought was, 258 00:10:45,645 --> 00:10:47,864 "I hope the captain attends my fertility event." 259 00:10:47,995 --> 00:10:50,998 I honestly didn't even know you weren't human. 260 00:10:51,172 --> 00:10:52,739 ENSIGN: I get that all the time. 261 00:10:52,869 --> 00:10:54,001 [Stevens chuckles] 262 00:10:54,131 --> 00:10:55,916 Ooh, here we go! 263 00:10:57,395 --> 00:10:59,006 I've hit rock bottom. 264 00:10:59,136 --> 00:11:00,137 My friends had all discovered 265 00:11:00,268 --> 00:11:01,922 what I was doing on the holodeck. 266 00:11:02,052 --> 00:11:05,142 They shunned me. I felt stuck out of phase, 267 00:11:05,273 --> 00:11:07,754 like Geordi and Ro, wandering... 268 00:11:07,928 --> 00:11:09,581 alone. 269 00:11:09,712 --> 00:11:11,366 Stirring stuff, Mr. Bingston. 270 00:11:11,496 --> 00:11:13,063 I wish I could stay... 271 00:11:13,194 --> 00:11:15,239 Act Seven: The Oberth year. 272 00:11:15,413 --> 00:11:17,546 The Manticore was known as one of the fleet's 273 00:11:17,633 --> 00:11:19,156 - "fun" ships. - [snoring] 274 00:11:19,287 --> 00:11:20,854 - But it's hard to have fun... - [sputters] I'm here! [Laughs] 275 00:11:21,028 --> 00:11:22,725 when you go from being the star of the show 276 00:11:22,812 --> 00:11:24,771 to a two-bit player... 277 00:11:24,901 --> 00:11:26,816 ♪ ♪ 278 00:11:30,211 --> 00:11:31,734 [buhgoon chitters] 279 00:11:32,822 --> 00:11:34,694 [alien growls] 280 00:11:39,611 --> 00:11:41,178 - [crew arguing, shouting] - RANSOM: First officer's log, supplemental. 281 00:11:41,309 --> 00:11:42,876 What should have been a pretty straightforward 282 00:11:43,006 --> 00:11:44,791 creature study has gone a little sideways. 283 00:11:44,921 --> 00:11:46,575 We got two more incoming. 284 00:11:46,749 --> 00:11:49,578 - Aah! Damn it. - Ransom roll! Aah! 285 00:11:49,709 --> 00:11:51,623 - Watch out for the shuttles! - You let it go right past you! 286 00:11:51,754 --> 00:11:53,887 - I can't grab what I can't see. - Me? You're dumber than Fletcher. 287 00:11:54,931 --> 00:11:57,368 [panting] Great idea pulling a rock in here. 288 00:11:57,499 --> 00:11:59,153 Now we can't keep 'em away. 289 00:11:59,240 --> 00:12:00,284 What are you talking about, bro? 290 00:12:00,458 --> 00:12:01,938 You had the same idea. 291 00:12:02,069 --> 00:12:03,810 I can't get a scan if you don't calm them down. 292 00:12:03,940 --> 00:12:05,637 What does it look like I'm doing? 293 00:12:05,768 --> 00:12:07,204 RANSOM: Usually my expert guidance 294 00:12:07,291 --> 00:12:09,467 cuts through any crew conflict, but, occasionally, 295 00:12:09,598 --> 00:12:12,732 I have to resort to plan B. 296 00:12:12,819 --> 00:12:14,472 [whistles] 297 00:12:14,603 --> 00:12:16,083 Still can't get it together, huh? 298 00:12:16,257 --> 00:12:18,041 Gather round, your commander is here 299 00:12:18,172 --> 00:12:19,651 and I have a plan. 300 00:12:19,826 --> 00:12:21,566 [grunts] On one hand, 301 00:12:21,697 --> 00:12:23,046 you have these rowdy space cows. 302 00:12:23,220 --> 00:12:24,395 Buhgoon. 303 00:12:24,526 --> 00:12:25,832 And on the other, they're turning invisible 304 00:12:25,962 --> 00:12:27,355 and knocking everyone over. 305 00:12:27,485 --> 00:12:28,965 Oh, yeah. That's the stuff. 306 00:12:29,052 --> 00:12:30,880 How is this supposed to help? 307 00:12:30,967 --> 00:12:32,621 You got to believe in the power of exercise. 308 00:12:32,795 --> 00:12:34,884 Is he just working out? 309 00:12:35,058 --> 00:12:36,581 Come on, let's try to corner one. 310 00:12:36,712 --> 00:12:38,845 Physical fitness clears the mind. 311 00:12:39,019 --> 00:12:40,716 Oh, yeah! 312 00:12:40,847 --> 00:12:42,718 ♪ ♪ 313 00:12:42,849 --> 00:12:45,025 Those tubes were connected to a half-assed coil relay. 314 00:12:45,155 --> 00:12:47,288 I must have been distracted. Maybe my mom was visiting? 315 00:12:47,418 --> 00:12:48,811 So, we got to turn that off, too? 316 00:12:48,898 --> 00:12:50,682 Yeah, but I got it used from some Bynars, 317 00:12:50,857 --> 00:12:52,467 so it activates an AI defense golem 318 00:12:52,554 --> 00:12:53,424 to prevent tampering. 319 00:12:53,511 --> 00:12:55,078 What's an AI defense golem? 320 00:12:55,165 --> 00:12:57,298 Oh, it's an artificial construct that... Whoa! 321 00:12:57,428 --> 00:12:59,561 - Aah! - Meredith, it's up to you! 322 00:12:59,691 --> 00:13:00,780 What do I do? 323 00:13:00,910 --> 00:13:02,520 [Billups shouts] 324 00:13:02,651 --> 00:13:05,132 Force a reboot by holding down its power button 325 00:13:05,306 --> 00:13:06,786 while telling a sad story 326 00:13:06,960 --> 00:13:08,831 from your childhood that demonstrates human emotion. 327 00:13:08,962 --> 00:13:10,528 Uh, one time, when I was a kid, 328 00:13:10,702 --> 00:13:12,269 my dad took me to the beach and we saw a dead fish. 329 00:13:12,443 --> 00:13:13,880 That's not sad enough! 330 00:13:14,010 --> 00:13:15,316 Aw, for [bleep] sake, 331 00:13:15,446 --> 00:13:16,360 I haven't been overwhelmed with pain yet. 332 00:13:16,491 --> 00:13:17,927 We need to up the ante! 333 00:13:18,058 --> 00:13:19,886 But this is used to slice atoms. 334 00:13:20,016 --> 00:13:21,322 Yeah, mother[bleep], just 335 00:13:21,452 --> 00:13:23,933 zap me with that mother[bleep] thing! 336 00:13:24,064 --> 00:13:26,109 [cackles] That's the stuff! 337 00:13:26,283 --> 00:13:27,894 [whoops, meows] 338 00:13:28,024 --> 00:13:29,504 [both grunting] 339 00:13:36,119 --> 00:13:37,904 You can snap my neck, 340 00:13:37,991 --> 00:13:41,255 but what will you do against all your victims? 341 00:13:41,342 --> 00:13:43,735 All the Cardassian warriors 342 00:13:43,910 --> 00:13:45,868 getting their revenge. 343 00:13:46,913 --> 00:13:48,436 They weren't warriors. 344 00:13:48,566 --> 00:13:50,307 They were occupiers! 345 00:13:50,481 --> 00:13:52,744 [grunting] 346 00:13:54,050 --> 00:13:55,878 FEDEROV: That is literally the wrong way to do that. 347 00:13:56,009 --> 00:13:58,272 KARAVITUS: Blah, blah, blah. Who do you think you are... Picard? 348 00:13:58,402 --> 00:14:01,144 [grunts, stammers] 349 00:14:01,275 --> 00:14:03,059 [Ransom grunting] 350 00:14:03,190 --> 00:14:04,713 Oh, yeah. 351 00:14:04,887 --> 00:14:07,585 [Zurkel groaning] 352 00:14:07,716 --> 00:14:10,719 Professor, is your research going as planned? 353 00:14:11,763 --> 00:14:14,766 - [hisses] - Oh, your face fell off. 354 00:14:14,897 --> 00:14:15,985 Do you need medical assistance? 355 00:14:16,159 --> 00:14:18,118 Silence, fool! [Grunts] 356 00:14:18,205 --> 00:14:19,859 You're not from Starfleet. 357 00:14:19,989 --> 00:14:21,121 That's right. 358 00:14:28,476 --> 00:14:30,521 [roars] 359 00:14:30,652 --> 00:14:32,219 You'll never take the Cerritos. 360 00:14:32,393 --> 00:14:34,395 We don't want your puny ship, 361 00:14:34,525 --> 00:14:36,353 - we want the buhgoon. - Why? 362 00:14:36,440 --> 00:14:38,747 To harvest their cloaking organs 363 00:14:38,878 --> 00:14:40,836 and maybe eat what's left, 364 00:14:40,967 --> 00:14:42,751 depending on texture and flavor. 365 00:14:42,838 --> 00:14:44,753 You're why they've been so agitated. 366 00:14:44,884 --> 00:14:45,797 Aah! 367 00:14:45,972 --> 00:14:47,625 - [grunts] - Your plan can't be 368 00:14:47,756 --> 00:14:48,975 to take control on your own. 369 00:14:49,105 --> 00:14:50,280 Of course not, 370 00:14:50,411 --> 00:14:51,847 which is why my infiltrators 371 00:14:51,978 --> 00:14:54,197 are targeting your senior officers! 372 00:14:54,328 --> 00:14:56,721 [snoring] 373 00:14:56,852 --> 00:14:59,072 He worked out so much he had to take a nap? 374 00:14:59,202 --> 00:15:01,465 You are the worst commander I've ever had in my life. 375 00:15:01,596 --> 00:15:03,772 - Wake up! - Oh! 376 00:15:05,208 --> 00:15:06,427 [shuddering] 377 00:15:08,995 --> 00:15:10,997 [meditative humming] 378 00:15:18,352 --> 00:15:20,832 ZURKEL: You and your pathetic crew 379 00:15:20,963 --> 00:15:22,704 are no match for my infiltrators. 380 00:15:22,791 --> 00:15:25,272 Everyone ignores the Clickets, 381 00:15:25,402 --> 00:15:27,752 but once we have the power to cloak our ships, 382 00:15:27,883 --> 00:15:29,580 we'll spread all over the quadrant! 383 00:15:29,667 --> 00:15:32,018 Clickets, Clickets. Why does that ring a bell? 384 00:15:32,148 --> 00:15:33,628 Ring a bel... See?! 385 00:15:33,715 --> 00:15:34,629 You don't even know us. 386 00:15:34,759 --> 00:15:36,239 And we've faced off before. 387 00:15:36,370 --> 00:15:37,632 - We have? - [hisses] 388 00:15:38,502 --> 00:15:40,200 [shouts] 389 00:15:40,330 --> 00:15:41,984 Ah. Thanks, Ensign. 390 00:15:42,115 --> 00:15:43,855 Thank you for coming to my recital. 391 00:15:44,030 --> 00:15:44,856 Aah! 392 00:15:45,031 --> 00:15:46,815 Sorry, I thought I saw some fire. 393 00:15:46,946 --> 00:15:49,687 On your feet, Stevens. We have invaders to repel. 394 00:15:49,818 --> 00:15:50,862 [grunts softly] 395 00:15:50,993 --> 00:15:53,126 But that's not on the schedule. 396 00:15:54,301 --> 00:15:55,737 I'm sorry, sir. 397 00:15:55,867 --> 00:15:57,565 I never should have messed with that light. 398 00:15:57,652 --> 00:15:59,262 [coughs] 399 00:15:59,393 --> 00:16:00,698 If you hadn't, 400 00:16:00,872 --> 00:16:02,004 we wouldn't have found all that stuff to fix. 401 00:16:02,135 --> 00:16:03,397 You got to let me get you out of there. 402 00:16:03,527 --> 00:16:04,659 No. 403 00:16:04,833 --> 00:16:06,226 You'd let all the coolant out. 404 00:16:06,356 --> 00:16:07,792 It's okay. 405 00:16:07,923 --> 00:16:09,446 This is how all engineers want to go. 406 00:16:09,577 --> 00:16:11,579 At work, in a tube. 407 00:16:11,709 --> 00:16:13,015 I can't let that happen. 408 00:16:16,497 --> 00:16:17,802 - [yells] - What are you doing? 409 00:16:17,933 --> 00:16:19,282 That axe is for emergencies only. 410 00:16:19,413 --> 00:16:21,502 What's your definition of an emergency? 411 00:16:21,676 --> 00:16:23,504 [grunts] We're in this together, sir. 412 00:16:23,678 --> 00:16:25,897 Fine, then hurry. [Grunts] 413 00:16:25,985 --> 00:16:28,161 We have to decouple the deuterium conduits 414 00:16:28,291 --> 00:16:29,510 before the thermal blankets push the valve blocks 415 00:16:29,640 --> 00:16:30,946 into the adjustment coils. 416 00:16:31,120 --> 00:16:32,469 And I'll deactivate the magnetic constrictors 417 00:16:32,556 --> 00:16:34,036 while you cycle the reactor conduits. 418 00:16:36,430 --> 00:16:37,561 FEDEROV: Sir, can we get 419 00:16:37,692 --> 00:16:38,780 some guidance on the... Whoa! 420 00:16:38,954 --> 00:16:40,129 - What the hell? - Die, Starfleet! 421 00:16:41,130 --> 00:16:42,653 - Deltas, take the left. - On it. 422 00:16:42,784 --> 00:16:44,351 [grunting] 423 00:16:50,792 --> 00:16:53,490 - [cheering] - We did it! 424 00:16:53,577 --> 00:16:56,885 Listen, us Beta shifters don't like you Delta shifters 425 00:16:57,016 --> 00:16:58,626 for all sorts of reasons. 426 00:16:58,756 --> 00:17:00,106 Right back at you. 427 00:17:00,193 --> 00:17:02,804 But we can at least agree that Ransom's the worst. 428 00:17:02,934 --> 00:17:05,154 - Totally. He sucks. - Big-time. 429 00:17:05,285 --> 00:17:06,895 I think he likes that we don't get along. 430 00:17:07,026 --> 00:17:09,071 It's like some weird power trip. 431 00:17:09,158 --> 00:17:10,768 How about we put aside our differences 432 00:17:10,942 --> 00:17:13,162 and work together to get these buhgoon under control 433 00:17:13,336 --> 00:17:14,772 - just to spite him? - Yes. 434 00:17:14,903 --> 00:17:16,470 - Oh, I'm in. - Let's do it. 435 00:17:16,557 --> 00:17:18,385 - [snoring continues] - MOXY: Shh, shh. 436 00:17:18,515 --> 00:17:19,995 [whispering]: Over here, over here. 437 00:17:20,126 --> 00:17:21,779 - Shh. - FEDEROV: Get over here, big guy. 438 00:17:23,259 --> 00:17:25,609 Damn it, we need to get to the bridge. 439 00:17:25,696 --> 00:17:27,481 [hissing] 440 00:17:27,568 --> 00:17:29,526 [growling] 441 00:17:34,444 --> 00:17:36,533 [chuckles] I'm just glad you don't play the recorder. 442 00:17:36,707 --> 00:17:38,144 [exclaims] 443 00:17:38,231 --> 00:17:39,275 One more step and you'll feel pain 444 00:17:39,362 --> 00:17:40,842 like you've never felt before. 445 00:17:40,972 --> 00:17:42,974 [angry meowing] 446 00:17:44,324 --> 00:17:45,412 [grunts] 447 00:17:45,542 --> 00:17:46,717 That was set to kill. 448 00:17:46,891 --> 00:17:48,937 So am I! 449 00:17:49,068 --> 00:17:50,591 - [meowing viciously] - [Clicket groaning] 450 00:17:53,594 --> 00:17:55,509 [meowing] 451 00:17:55,639 --> 00:17:58,338 [groaning] 452 00:17:58,512 --> 00:18:00,557 And scene. 453 00:18:00,688 --> 00:18:02,733 [meditative humming] 454 00:18:04,518 --> 00:18:07,521 [grunting] 455 00:18:10,785 --> 00:18:11,916 Die, Starfleet! 456 00:18:14,180 --> 00:18:16,138 [groaning] 457 00:18:17,400 --> 00:18:20,490 [grunting] 458 00:18:20,621 --> 00:18:22,101 [growls] 459 00:18:23,972 --> 00:18:26,409 - Put me down. - [yells] 460 00:18:26,540 --> 00:18:29,238 Welcome to the bear pack. 461 00:18:29,412 --> 00:18:30,848 - [crunches] - [yells] 462 00:18:37,420 --> 00:18:38,465 [Clicket chittering] 463 00:18:38,639 --> 00:18:42,077 Oh. Oh, buddy, sorry about that. 464 00:18:43,557 --> 00:18:47,604 My infiltrators have taken over every deck, Captain. 465 00:18:47,735 --> 00:18:50,172 You have no power over my warriors. 466 00:18:50,259 --> 00:18:51,608 The Clickets. 467 00:18:52,957 --> 00:18:54,524 You're right, I don't. 468 00:18:54,655 --> 00:18:59,050 I guess I have to compliment you on a successful invasion. 469 00:18:59,181 --> 00:19:00,878 [gasps] What did you say? 470 00:19:01,009 --> 00:19:01,966 You're amazing at subterfuge. 471 00:19:02,053 --> 00:19:04,012 - [groaning] - Stop. 472 00:19:04,186 --> 00:19:05,448 What's happening? 473 00:19:05,579 --> 00:19:06,841 You see? This is why you pay attention 474 00:19:07,015 --> 00:19:08,364 in the morning briefing. 475 00:19:08,495 --> 00:19:11,106 Clickets can't stand being complimented. 476 00:19:11,237 --> 00:19:14,153 [pained groan] Your kind words burn me. 477 00:19:14,327 --> 00:19:15,458 It's not my fault your species evolved 478 00:19:15,589 --> 00:19:18,113 a fight-or-flight response to being praised. 479 00:19:18,244 --> 00:19:19,419 I'll kill you. 480 00:19:19,506 --> 00:19:21,551 - You're handsome. - [groaning] 481 00:19:21,725 --> 00:19:24,511 [over P.A.]: You've got amazing breath. I love your work. 482 00:19:24,685 --> 00:19:26,904 I'm impressed with your whole vibe. 483 00:19:26,991 --> 00:19:29,255 - [groans] - At the end of the day, you're a captain doing his best 484 00:19:29,342 --> 00:19:32,780 to watch out for his crew, and I respect that. 485 00:19:32,910 --> 00:19:37,828 Aah! Emergency transport. Everyone out of there now. 486 00:19:40,701 --> 00:19:42,616 ♪ ♪ 487 00:19:45,314 --> 00:19:48,317 [groans] What a bunch of weirdos. 488 00:19:52,669 --> 00:19:54,062 There you go. 489 00:19:54,236 --> 00:19:55,063 Go home, big guy. 490 00:19:55,237 --> 00:19:57,065 [buhgoon snorts] 491 00:19:58,109 --> 00:20:00,329 These things aren't so bad once they calm down. 492 00:20:00,460 --> 00:20:02,288 You're not so bad yourself. 493 00:20:02,418 --> 00:20:03,898 Sorry for being such a hard-ass earlier. 494 00:20:03,985 --> 00:20:05,943 I guess nothing brings people together 495 00:20:06,074 --> 00:20:07,423 like a mutual enemy. 496 00:20:07,597 --> 00:20:09,425 I'm talking about Ransom, not the invaders. 497 00:20:09,556 --> 00:20:11,949 - You guys want to hit the bar? - Uh, yes. 498 00:20:15,518 --> 00:20:16,780 [doors whoosh open] 499 00:20:16,911 --> 00:20:19,566 [chuckles] Works every time. 500 00:20:19,740 --> 00:20:20,958 First officer's log. 501 00:20:21,132 --> 00:20:24,135 As usual, my grasp of the lower-decker mind 502 00:20:24,223 --> 00:20:25,876 has proven to... Oh, uh... [clears throat] 503 00:20:26,007 --> 00:20:27,356 Carry on, Ensign. 504 00:20:27,530 --> 00:20:29,576 I know you just pretend to be an idiot 505 00:20:29,706 --> 00:20:31,317 to trick us into getting along. 506 00:20:31,404 --> 00:20:33,188 - Are you gonna tell anyone? - No. 507 00:20:33,319 --> 00:20:34,450 I think it's cute. 508 00:20:34,537 --> 00:20:35,930 Plus everyone thinks you're a doofus. 509 00:20:36,104 --> 00:20:37,366 Nobody would believe me. 510 00:20:37,497 --> 00:20:40,108 'Cause I'm just that good at the job. 511 00:20:43,764 --> 00:20:46,680 It was a scary, weird day, 512 00:20:46,767 --> 00:20:49,073 but it really was a good learning experience. 513 00:20:49,204 --> 00:20:50,336 Thanks, Andarithio. 514 00:20:50,466 --> 00:20:52,163 Whoa, gonna stop you right there. 515 00:20:52,251 --> 00:20:53,904 First names only when we're on the brink of death. 516 00:20:54,078 --> 00:20:55,428 Yes, sir. 517 00:20:55,558 --> 00:20:58,039 I'll get to dismantling that electronic face. 518 00:20:58,169 --> 00:21:00,563 - Commander Billups, are you busy? - What's up, Cadet? 519 00:21:00,694 --> 00:21:03,087 I found a burned-out indicator light above the door. 520 00:21:03,174 --> 00:21:04,698 Could you help me with the repair? 521 00:21:05,829 --> 00:21:07,527 Let's do this. 522 00:21:08,571 --> 00:21:10,225 So, what's next on the schedule? 523 00:21:10,399 --> 00:21:12,880 - Nothing, you're all good. - Come on, Stevens. 524 00:21:13,010 --> 00:21:14,447 Those Clickets had to put us behind. 525 00:21:14,577 --> 00:21:17,406 See? Look, there's a meeting in Holodeck Three. 526 00:21:17,493 --> 00:21:19,365 But you said you needed some time off. 527 00:21:19,495 --> 00:21:22,281 Yeah, it's my anniversary today. 528 00:21:22,411 --> 00:21:24,805 I was gonna try to have a nice long call 529 00:21:24,935 --> 00:21:27,198 - with Admiral Freeman. - You still should. 530 00:21:27,329 --> 00:21:30,376 I know little meetings with the crew seem inconsequential, 531 00:21:30,506 --> 00:21:32,987 but they're the most important part of being a captain. 532 00:21:33,117 --> 00:21:34,380 The admiral will understand. 533 00:21:36,164 --> 00:21:37,252 Zo? 534 00:21:37,383 --> 00:21:38,558 - Carol? - Wha...? 535 00:21:38,688 --> 00:21:39,907 What are the odds of seeing you here? 536 00:21:39,994 --> 00:21:41,952 - How did you...? - Mm. 537 00:21:42,039 --> 00:21:43,650 Mr. Stevens reached out a month ago, 538 00:21:43,780 --> 00:21:46,870 said he made sure to put some time on your schedule 539 00:21:47,044 --> 00:21:49,220 so I could surprise you with a romantic dinner. 540 00:21:49,351 --> 00:21:50,744 Oh, honey. 541 00:21:50,831 --> 00:21:53,050 I can't believe you came all the way out here from Earth. 542 00:21:53,181 --> 00:21:55,575 Happy anniversary. How was your day? 543 00:21:55,705 --> 00:21:57,664 Alien invaders, chaos in engineering, 544 00:21:57,794 --> 00:22:00,188 Shaxs fighting demons, you know, just the usual. 545 00:22:00,319 --> 00:22:02,538 Hmm. Glad to hear you had it easy. 546 00:22:07,935 --> 00:22:11,199 Mr. Shaxs, you made a quick exit from the morning meeting. 547 00:22:11,330 --> 00:22:14,855 Oh, just my usual fight with the astral projection 548 00:22:14,985 --> 00:22:17,510 of my unresolved rage from the occupation. 549 00:22:17,640 --> 00:22:19,860 Did you know therapy can armor you 550 00:22:19,990 --> 00:22:22,645 with even more weapons for your metaphysical battles? 551 00:22:22,776 --> 00:22:24,473 - When can we start?! - Ow! 552 00:22:24,604 --> 00:22:26,432 [bleep], that chowder's hot. 553 00:22:27,911 --> 00:22:30,827 Okay, fine, I get it. We can stock up on pain meds. 554 00:22:30,958 --> 00:22:33,047 - That's a good kitty. - Ah, shut up. 555 00:22:33,177 --> 00:22:34,614 [purrs] 556 00:22:36,093 --> 00:22:38,269 Ah, bar sweet bar. 557 00:22:38,400 --> 00:22:41,490 Uh, I think I just heard someone say they fended off invaders. 558 00:22:41,664 --> 00:22:43,231 Did we miss something? 559 00:22:43,362 --> 00:22:45,494 No way. Nothing ever happens if we're not involved. 560 00:22:45,668 --> 00:22:48,149 [sousaphone blowing] 561 00:22:48,323 --> 00:22:50,412 Perhaps our commanders are the leads of their own stories 562 00:22:50,543 --> 00:22:52,109 when we are not observing them. 563 00:22:52,240 --> 00:22:54,938 [scoffs] No way. We're the spice and glitter around here. 564 00:22:55,025 --> 00:22:57,550 Is it that hard to believe they do interesting stuff, too? 565 00:22:57,724 --> 00:23:00,161 Yes. That's my whole worldview. Stop trying to shake it. 566 00:23:00,248 --> 00:23:01,858 I saw your dad in the hall. 567 00:23:01,989 --> 00:23:03,512 Yeah, right. That's impossible. 568 00:23:03,599 --> 00:23:05,035 I saw him, too. He was kissing your mom. 569 00:23:05,166 --> 00:23:06,428 Stop making stuff up. 570 00:23:06,559 --> 00:23:08,387 I saw Admiral Freeman and the captain 571 00:23:08,517 --> 00:23:10,040 - getting trapped in a painting. - What? No way. Really? 572 00:23:10,171 --> 00:23:11,477 T'LYN: No. 573 00:23:11,607 --> 00:23:12,608 I have made a joke at your expense. 574 00:23:12,739 --> 00:23:13,914 Boom. 575 00:23:14,044 --> 00:23:16,046 [all laughing] 576 00:23:16,177 --> 00:23:20,442 Captioned by Media Access Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org 577 00:24:13,626 --> 00:24:15,279 [man imitates weapons firing] 578 00:24:17,064 --> 00:24:18,239 Chirp.